Love Letters for Labor
Written by Shay Gabriel
The following 9 love letters for labor are inspired by 9 main personality types as expressed through the Enneagram. Whether you know your Enneagram type or not, you are likely to resonate with one of the love letters below. With each love letter, we’ve included an affirmation and practical steps you can take to overcome any internal barriers that might be holding you back from embracing birth as the beautiful, natural process that it is.
To the birthing person who…
has a tendency to fall into being self-critical & perfectionistic / is an enneagram 1
May you enter into labor with a posture of patience & trust toward your body, freeing yourself from rigid expectations & embracing your intuition as the birthing process unfolds.
Affirmation:
“Birth is good, my body is good, I am good.”
Suggested practice:
Try listening to / reading several birth stories! Give the Birthful podcast, The Birth Hour, or our birth stories log a try.
To the birthing person who…
has a habit of people-pleasing & overlooking their own needs / is an enneagram 2
May you enter into labor recognizing that your needs matter. By attending to your own needs, you are simultaneously fostering your own well-being & your baby's. It's as if focusing on your own care, ironically, lends to one of the most selfless acts of love humanly possible: gently giving birth.
Affirmation:
"I express what I need."
Suggested practice:
Practice checking in with your own needs daily. Regularly ask yourself, “What do I need? Did I name my need?” Tell a partner or close loved one about your practice, then try asking them to help you with your specific needs. The more you practice recognizing, naming, and asking for what you need, the more comfortable it becomes!
To the birthing person who…
tends to get caught up in what others think & crafting an admirable image / is an enneagram 3
May you enter into labor without those chains & instead focus on being present with your body and baby. Embrace the natural flow of birth as the labor process unfolds! You've got this.
Affirmation:
“Birth transcends all measures of success.”
Suggested practice:
Any time you make a mental note of an achievement (or lack thereof), ask yourself: How does this make me feel in the present moment, and why? What do I feel in my body, and where? Then practice telling someone how you feel in the moment instead of what you did.
To the birthing person who…
feels defective or operates from a posture of self-pity / is an enneagram 4
May you bring into labor your gift for recognizing beauty in all things. May you see yourself and the labor process as wholly beautiful, too. This is good for both the human spirit and for the physiology of birth.
Affirmation:
“Giving birth is normal, natural, & beautiful.”
Suggested practice:
Follow birth photography on Instagram! We highly recommend @sproutandblossombirth and @birthbecomesyou.
To the birthing person who…
tends to seek control over the environment via knowledge / is an enneagram 5
May you enter labor with a sense of trust in your informed intuition & embrace your body's birthing instincts. May this free you from operating out of your thinking brain & allow you to slip into labor land, where physiological processes are less inhibited.
Affirmation:
“I embrace the wisdom of my body.”
Suggested practice:
Read up on Evidence Based Birth (or listen to the podcast!) to inform your intuition. Speaking of “inform your intuition”, I think I stole that phrase from Adriana Lozada of Birthful — another great resource filled with information + personal experiences that will help you trust birth with your mind and your body.
To the birthing person who…
tends to doubt themselves & to search for external reassurance / is an enneagram 6
When it comes time to give birth, we hope you have a supportive birth team in place and that you feel empowered to embrace the incredible, extraordinary strength that comes from within your laboring body. (Seriously, it's a magic like nothing else!)
Affirmation:
“My body knows what to do.”
Suggested practice:
Interview your local doulas, midwives, and OBs — and when you do, ask yourself: Who do I feel the most at ease with? Who feels the most trustworthy, and why? Who shares unbiased information with me and empowers me to make informed decisions?
You might start your search here: Bornbir
To the birthing person who…
struggles to stay present in attempt to avoid emotional pain / is an enneagram 7
May you free yourself from any compulsion to rush through labor in recognition that each and every step of the physiological process contributes to the ultimate goal: bringing a child into the world. Let your body feel the feels - physically & emotionally. Lean in; resistance causes tension.
Affirmation:
“I embrace the spontaneous nature of birth.”
Suggested practice:
Meditation. I know, one of my Enneagram 7 besties is probably rolling her eyes at me right now. But listen friends, meditation can come in many forms, and you can start with something that feels active but actually helps the mind focus on the present! Consider taking up a pottery class (or some other form of art therapy), prenatal yoga, or practicing breathwork in an herbal bath with a guided meditation, affirmations, and scentless candlelight.
To the birthing person who…
tends to project a false image of strength & self-control to mask their fear / is an enneagram 8
Rather than avoid your fears before giving birth, may you investigate & work through them. May those fears be replaced with genuine strength & trust. And may you name your needs all throughout labor, authentically advocating for yourself & your baby.
Affirmation:
"I embrace the power of vulnerability & work through my fears."
Suggested practice:
Try journaling your thoughts around birth. Specifically, ask yourself: What messages did I receive about birth as a child? What messages am I receiving about birth now? What fears or hangups might I have around birth? Then share your thoughts with a doula or other trusted member of your birth team. We have everything you need to get started right here: pregnancy journal bundle. Find out more about our doula services here.
To the birthing person who…
tends to avoid tension by presenting a false sense of calm / is an enneagram 9
Our hope is that throughout labor, you have an awareness of where you hold tension in your body, and that you consciously free that tension, allowing for a true sense of calm that's conducive to the physiology of birth.
Affirmation:
“I am present with my body & baby as we go with the flow.”
Suggested practice:
Regularly “scan” your body for tension, starting at the top of your head and working your way down to your toes. Any time you sense tension, take a deep breath, envision the breath releasing the tension, and resume scanning. If tension lingers, investigate that further. Is there something or someone you need to address in order to relieve this tension?
Connect with us!
Did any of these affirmations or practices have a positive impact on your experience with birth? We would LOVE to hear from you! Connect with us on social media by clicking on the icons below (in the green footer).
Shay Gabriel is the content director at Sprout and Blossom whose love of parenthood and psychology has merged into a super-obsession of all things birthy and baby. She believes an informed experience lends to an empowered experience, no matter where you are along the journey.